Do you judge yourself for dreaming big?
Do you judge yourself for wanting more in life? Does judging yourself for wanting to look and feel fantastic stop you from achieving your goal?
Then welcome to the club.
Dreaming big and allowing yourself to dream big takes big time cojones.
It takes courage. It takes the courage to look fear in the eyes, every single day, and ignore it screaming "Who are you to dream big?".
Fear (a.k.a the lower brain) will show its ugly face every single moment you're attempting to change. It washes over you like a cold shower, like a panicky feeling, every single time you try to step outside of your comfort zone. Fear shows itself in different ways, but self-doubt is the sneakiest one. "Who am I to want this?"...yeah, probably better to back down into my comfy little cave.
I want to tell you something here.
Fear will always be part of your human experience. Fear will always be present. The feeling of fear is a direct reflection of your thinking. Your thoughts are like air bubbles coming from your lower brain. Understanding this will put fear in another light. Your thoughts are not you. Your thoughts are not personal. They show up by their own will, and like bubbles, they will burst or float away, if you let them. Fear is like that, bubbles. See them, allow them to pass, and keep walking towards your goal.
Dreaming big creates so many bubbles though.
Your brain will sense your attempt at stepping outside of your comfort zone. It will produce a crazy amount of bubbles. You'll find yourself surrounded by bubbles, and it will make you lose clarity. You'll lose sight of why and where you're going.
Every time you find yourself feeling fear and doubt, it's the brain judging your dream. Your brain will go into a full launch calling on a whole little army of fear bubbles. Some of them are big and scream at you "Your dream is stupid!" "Who do you think you are???".
The solution is to let the bubbles pass calmly.
Don't try to burst the bubbles. If you try to catch them and try to break them, then the noise gets even louder, and it can feel as if they are holding you hostage. Just let those fear bubbles, with all their judgments pass. Keep walking. Keep moving forward. Keep marching towards your goals.
How is fear holding you back in life? How do you judge yourself for wanting things?
Every time you notice your world getting smaller and narrower I want you to acknowledge that. See the bubbles closing in on your comfort zone. Then take a deep breath and keep walking. Keep expanding your world. March on towards your dreams and deepest wishes.
There is no magic wand here.
Fear will stop screaming at you if you let the bubbles float away. So you have to let them go. Stop holding on to fear. Let it go.
Whenever I judge myself for wanting to dream big and for wanting more for myself, I stop and recognize it for what it is. The brain doing its job. Trying to keep me safe in my little comfort zone. Every time I see and feel fear I take a deep breath and let it float away. And then I keep walking. I keep moving forward. I keep dreaming big and refuse to let it hold me back. Every time fear tries to talk me out of doing something, I do it anyway. Doing it anyway is the key to reach your goal and dream. Doing it despite fear. Doing it despite self-doubt. Marching on despite the brain judging you. Letting it all go.
Daring to dream big takes courage.
It's showing up and being vulnerable. It's about daring to feel raw, feel judged and feel doubt. It's about seeing that you're feeling so much fear because of your thinking. It's knowing that your thinking is not you. It never was, and therefore nothing you need to stop and analyze.
“The size of your dreams must always exceed your current capacity to achieve them. If your dreams do not scare you, they are not big enough.”
― Ellen Johnson Sirleaf
Living life, being part of the human experience, means walking despite fear. Being shit scared and doing it anyway.